I just read this in an article: “Perception is often not reality, but it is often taken as such.”
That sums up EXACTLY what’s been on my mind the past few months. People tell themselves stories about everything – who they are, who others are, how others perceive them, what others’ intentions are. We can’t pinpoint a percentage of how often these stories are correct. I would wager than no one is ever 100% correct in an assumption. Even what you tell yourself about your own life and behaviour is probably somewhat askew.
I have been very bothered in the past when I’ve realized someone has perceived something I said or did in a way that was not what I intended. I caught glimpses of another person’s “story” they’ve told themself (and too often shared with others behind my back) about me. I really wanted to fix these misconceptions. That’s been something I’ve really struggled with. But sadly, it’s impossible most of the time. People are going to think whatever they want and I think it’s actually really rare for you to change their mind. Plus, it’s exhausting and emotionally draining trying to clean up messes or even to just contemplate what other people might be thinking about you. I’ve decided that I’m just going to let people think whatever they want about me. I have to be secure enough in who I am and stand by my actions, interpreted the way I intended or not, to not worry about it. I’m not responsible for other people’s perceptions. Only my own.